Archive for the ‘silliness’ Category

« Older Entries

Epic Self Documenting Code

October 9th, 2009

This is the best:

switch (mIntegrationDirection)
{
   case InventoryIntegrationDirection.DoTheSameChangeInShop:
      DoTheSameChangeInShop(GetChangedDataFromInventory(mLastSynchDate));
      break;

   case InventoryIntegrationDirection.DoTheSameChangeInInventory:
      DoTheSameChangeInInventory(GetChangedDataFromShop(mLastSynchDate));
      break;

   case InventoryIntegrationDirection.DoTheSameChangeInShopThenDoTheSameChangeInInventoryForNotChangedDataInInventory:
      DoTheSameChangeInShopThenDoTheSameChangeInInventoryForNotChangedDataInInventory(
	   GetChangedDataFromInventory(mLastSynchDate),
	   GetChangedDataFromShop(mLastSynchDate));
      break;

   case InventoryIntegrationDirection.DoTheSameChangeInInventoryThenDoTheSameChangeInShopForNotChangedData:
      DoTheSameChangeInInventoryThenDoTheSameChangeInShopForNotChangedData(
	   GetChangedDataFromShop(mLastSynchDate),
	   GetChangedDataFromInventory(mLastSynchDate));
      break;

   default:
      break;
}

Read how this travesty occurred at DailyWTF

1 Comment »

Posted in general, java, silliness

Python’s Beards and Ruby’s ‘Cool’ Guys

July 30th, 2009

I was having a chat on the MicroSoft Networks fancy comms protocol. Aka: MSN. Along came someone with an opinion. As is customary I shot it down with wild abandon!!

The quickie backstory:

  • I suggested Python is better than Ruby.
  • They argued using two example pictures – see below.

Rubyists

ruby_programmers.jpg



I Said:

The Ruby pic: The guy on the right has his eyebrow raised as if to say: “I’m fucking amazing”. The rest of them are all geeks who are using Ruby as their way to be cool in a world that rejected them at high school age for being geeks. Little do they realise (maybe deep down they do) but the only people who may think they’re cool is a small fringe group of other Ruby-ists and beginner coders. The other Ruby-ists will be consumed by an undertone of competitiveness. The Python coders will think they’re rubbish fanboys. The hot girl who rejected them at high school will think they’re just like any other geek.

Pythonistas

504x_Picture_2_23-18-44.png



I Said:

The good thing about the Python coders is they’re not bothered. They’re just not even trying. They’re so past giving a shit about being cool that they’ve all grown ugly facial hair.

This piercing psychological insight into the programmers of Python and Ruby is just the tip of the iceberg. For $200 I’ll furnish you with a graph showing my facts in a nice way that will go well in a professional report.

20 Comments »

Posted in python, ruby, silliness

Tags:

Saturday Code Quote: 7

December 27th, 2008

Tsk.

	/*
	** The following shit is necessary because Netscape developers don't
	** know how to read the fucking RFCs.
	*/

From the source of the Courier Mail Server.

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness

Tags:

Colour & Centre

December 15th, 2008

I’ve never broached this subject with other Brits so I don’t know if its an annoyance to anyone else but I’m going to get on my soapbox.

It REALLY pisses me off having to misspell COLOUR and CENTRE all the fu&^%ng time when using CSS!!

I don’t want to get into the linguistic history, the right and wrongs, etc.  Its about personal upbringing and life.  If I eat pasta I eat it like an Englishman.  Not an Italian.  If I eat Chinese I eat it with a knife and fork* not with chopsticks.

So why the fucking hell do I need to type American English to use an international standard?

And I’m sick of Firefox telling me these words are spelt wrong**:

  • Programme
  • Learnt
  • Lorry
  • Colour
  • Centre
  • Metre

Like “Firefox” is even a bloody word!!

* I do often use chopsticks – but its personal choice as opposed to being forced by Neo-Nazi bastards in the W3C.

** I know this can be fixed by switching to the British English dictionary but then I wouldn’t be able to rant about it would I?

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness, web technologies

Tags:

Aaaw

December 14th, 2008

He finally did it! on TwitPic

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness

Tags:

Saturday Code Quote: 5

December 13th, 2008

Giant chickens…

// make that big fucking chicken chase the mouse

From Chickens for Linux

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness

Tags:

Saturday Code Quote: 4

December 6th, 2008

GTK is rubbish anyway – use Qt. :) 

/* Seriously, why can't non-gtk-apps at least try to be decent citizens?
			   Take this fucking OpenOffice.org 1.9 for example. The morons responsible
			   for this utter piece of crap gave the clip size wrong values! :'(  */

From the source of Rezlooks – A GTK theme engine.

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness

Tags:

Insight, Facts and Hmmms

November 30th, 2008

I’m a big fan of Google Insight.  Mainly because it burns time when I’m bored and provides lots of “hmm” moments.  Its a service Google provide that lets you see search volume against a range of other factors such as geography, time, etc.  I thought I’d put a few together that may be of interest to you all.

Django is HUGE in Russia

I have no idea why this is.  Maybe because Django sounds slightly Russian?  No thats ridiculous.  But just look at those numbers – compared to the US and the UK (doesn’t appear) its huge!

Why do the Russians Love Django?

Why do the Russians Love Django?

Rails is in Decline

The Google searches tell no lies.  It seems that Rails is in decline while Django is on a steady and solid incline.  Vive le Django.

My Heart Bleeds

Everyone Forgot How to Use PHP’s substr Function

A collective dose of amnesia seems to have struck the world as the search term “substr” seems to have had an 80% increase in recent years.

Surely its Not Hard?

Surely its Not Hard?

Scala? Don’t bother.

Scala was big a few months back with a sudden influx of tutorials and discourse posted to dZone.  Unfortunately looking at the graph its pointless bothering with it.  On top of that Guido doesn’t think much of it either – and he knows his languages.

See that Bottom Feeder? Scala.

See that Bottom Feeder? Scala.

Canadians Love Merb

I like Canadians.  They were never quite so anti-British as the Americans.  They still have our Queen as their head of State and have none of the beligerant crankiness of republicans in America and Australia.  Its no suprise then that they like Merb – a lot.  Merb is of course ‘Rails-that-works’.

God Save the Queen

God Save the Queen

Well I’m sure you’ve all enjoyed these stunning eye-openers.  If I find anymore then I’ll be sure to let you all know.  In the mean time – have a good day.

Leave your comment »

Posted in general, php, python, rails, ruby, silliness

Tags:

Saturday Code Quote: 3

November 29th, 2008

Step away form the computer…

newlocation must now be the absolute path on newhost.
If not we’ve been redirected to somewhere totally stupid
(oh yeah, no offsite linking, go to our fucking front page).
Say goodbye to the webserver in this case. In fact, we don’t
even say goodbye, but just drop the connection.

From the source of Liferea – A Linux RSS/news aggregator

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness

Tags:

Saturday Code Quote: 2

November 22nd, 2008

NOW!

/* get me out of this shitbag loop */

From the source of Part-ND which is a “Unix-based, ANSI C, arbitrary-dimensional, stand-alone particle system and fast gravitational simulator”

Leave your comment »

Posted in silliness

Tags: